What in the hell am I doing with my life.
I asked myself that question in my office eighteen months before my first anxiety attack. On paper, nothing was wrong. Great marriage, healthy kids, good job, best shape of my life. But I'd been at Route 91 Harvest in Las Vegas on October 1, 2017, when the gunfire started. I told my wife I loved her and that we'd get out, not sure if it was true. We didn't get everyone out.
That was a wound done to me. My dad leaving when I was six was another. But some of the deepest wounds in my story aren't ones that happened to me. They're ones I caused. Years of partying and gambling nearly cost me my marriage and my family. I know what it's like to carry a wound. I also know what it's like to be one.
I spent years thinking all of that disqualified me. I was wrong. It built the framework. Acknowledge the hurt. Realize what it did to you. Unlock what it built in you. That's what got me through an anxiety attack that left me curled on a floor questioning my calling, and it's what I hand every man and every founder I work with now.
